APRIL TEWNTY-EIGHTH: The spider catches flies because she has spun her web. Museum, rocking chair, a red haired man. Burger be, may your grind be fine but not too fine.

APRIL TWENTY-FOURTH: Don't grind your teeth over phone calls-- it's your own jaw you're breaking. Hardwood, Mother, Thunder. May the grill mark you evenly. Burger be.

APRIL NINETEENTH: A beloved man from the beyond implores that treasure be sought in unforseen places. Keep in mind the rightful owners. Is it worth it? Red sand, church basement, crystal skull, eyewitness, wooden flute, ginger tabby. Burger be, and may all your buns be seeded with sesame.

APRIL FOURTEENTH: Proximity to fame may not be worth feigning delight at parties. Keep your shower clean. Firewood, tin foil, matching pyjama set. Many condiments be upon you. Burger be.

APRIL EIGHTH: When wading through wasit-deep water, avoid the persuit of bears. Keep your eyes on the horizon, and do not stop to poke dead fish. Digital camera, white pine. An old woman, a young girl. A white washed double wide. Burger be, and may all your patties be stacked.